forgiveness is one of the most practical things I know.
A primary forgiveness practice in the workplace (and beyond) is reframing or resetting the story of blame that brews in your mind when someone annoys or hurts you. This is similar to Fred Luskin’s (Forgive for Good) nine steps to forgiveness where the ninth step is to “Amend your grievance story to remind you of the heroic choice to forgive.”
Wigglesworth offers a doorway into this story transformation. She asks, “What would it take for ME to do this obnoxious thing that this person is doing?” As we begin to posit scenarios that could lead us down that path, we broaden the possibilities and counter-balance the blaming stories. Then, we realize a humbling fact:
I don’t really know what’s going on with that person.
Armed with a clear understanding of unknowing, we may give the benefit of the doubt, let our annoyance and anger subside, forgive ourselves for jumping to conclusions, and, perhaps, offer to assist the formerly-known-as-obnoxious person before us.
Forgiveness is the journey of moving from telling the story as a victim to telling the story as a hero. Forgiveness means that your story changes so that you and not the grievance are in control. Fred Luskin
Cindy Wigglesworth’s Spiritual Intelligence (SQ) is based upon the concept of multiple intelligences and completes a triad along with Cognitive Intelligence (IQ) and Emotional Intelligence (EQ). She sets for the basics of Spiritual Intelligence in a recent TEDx talk (watch now)