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Roundabouts

4/14/2015

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We have a growing phenomenon in our town – the roundabout.

Intersections are being reworked into small circles, two lanes deep with two, three or four spoke-like roads coming away from them. I like them, but they’re wimpy. They pale in comparison to the big city roundabouts – three-to-five lanes deep with six, seven, even eight roads emanating from the hub. THAT’S a roundabout!
When we are betrayed or hurt, it’s like driving into one of these larger roundabouts for the first time – surrounded by a frenzy of cars constantly turning and vying for position. It’s disorienting and our only thought: protection. We do all we can to avoid the other cars – to keep them at arm’s length.

Eventually, we adapt and learn to survive in our lane, going round and round when, suddenly, a near miss, and all the pain and bitterness returns. We lash out and blame the other cars around us.

When we find a well-protected place in the flow of a particular lane, we can end up staying there a long time…going round and round and round the circle – stuck! – until we’re motivated to act.

Taking action, we open ourselves to the other cars around us and become familiar with them – vehicles of anger, frustration, pain and bitterness. As we get to know them – their speed, movements in and out of lanes – the ferocity of the once dangerous vehicles lessens, and we begin to navigate toward the outside lane.

Reaching the outside lane, we face one more decision: what road shall we take from here? We assess the options, make our selection, and leave the roundabout behind, moving on to the open road.

Safe travels.

Quote
Forgiving is never easy and it is never cheap. It isn't anything that you can demand of others. But when it happens it has an incredible capacity to change a situation.  Desmond Tutu

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Want steps toward forgiveness without the metaphor? Here’s a post with three views on how to forgive (read now)
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